How To Get Over Someone You Love - Time Helps

Going through a breakup is never an enjoyable experience. It doesn't matter which side of the break up you're on, and it doesn't matter how amicable it seemed to be; it's still a relationship coming to an end. No matter how long you were together, you had time to build up real feelings for the other person, and now you want to know how to get over someone you still love. I'm going to be honest, it won't always be easy, but it is possible.

Before we start looking at the specific steps you can take to get over someone after a break up, let's take a look at why that's so important to do. It's important because you are going to have to move on. You will eventually meet somebody new (or maybe you have already). The new person in your life deserves your full affections and shouldn't have to compete with the feelings you have for someone else. Okay, now on to ways to get over your ex.

The first thing to do is think about any of the times you were treated poorly. Did your ex ever put you down? Did they ever intentionally ignore your thoughts or feelings? Were they abusive? This step can be painful, but the goal is to show yourself that they maybe didn't love you as much as you thought they did. This makes it easier to stop feeling as though they should be loved back.

You also need to give things some time. The more time that passes after your break up, the less affection you should be feeling. Unfortunately, sometimes the opposite is true. It seems that the longer we are separated, the stronger our love for the other person becomes. Don't let that happen to you.

Another thing that will help to answer the question of how to get over someone you still love is to accept that it's over. Your ex has already moved on. What you had may have been special, but there will be somebody else who will be even more special. Living in a fantasy world where your ex and you will be happy again isn't going to help get your feelings back in check. Therefore, it's best to accept reality and move ahead with your life.

Refocusing is another method of getting over an ex. People’s emotions can run high after a break up. This can actually amplify your feelings of love. The problem is that they are focused on the wrong person. So, if you can change the target of your affection, it will help you to get over the other person.

How to get over someone you still love is not always the easiest thing to do, no question. Relationships are complicated, and getting over them takes time. However, by following the tips above, you will soon be over your ex and be able to start living your life. After all, no matter what has happened in the past, you still deserve to be happy.
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Why Fantasies Are Actually Healthy For a Relationship

This is a great and useful article for you that i wrote for EzineArticles about what i think

is one very important issue that affect our life in many ways.

Ps. My own favourite resource which can help you within this subject is available by clicking on this link.

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As about why fantasies are actually healthy for a relationship I will begin telling you my own story. It all started out as almost every relationship almost on a bed of roses but gradually I found out that those roses had thorns to. Easy to say I really was no good copying on that side of a relationship meaning that every problem that rose up in our deep blue sky I neither faced it or talked about it. Neglecting it as long as possible became my way to "solve problems" which initially seemed to work but instead of going away things just became worse. Coming back to the title about fantasies I think it´s a key point to consider because we often start out with very positive fantasies of how our new love will be and also how our relationship will be, often more positive than realistic. Such fantasies are far from good in the long run but they are actually essential for a relationship in the beginning because otherwise we may not have had the courage to even consider to flirt with her at all. But if we use our fantasies to also see a positive solution possible when we discover the thorns it will help us. It´s easy to be negative and reject our own part of a dispute which make us self-imposed victims and therefore without quilt. Or as I did pretend everything´s alright which in the end will lead to a fight.

So what is there to do? I have a few good starting points here:

#1 is we both carry at least half of the problem.

#2 is listen more than you speak.

#3 is that the actual subject we disagree on is not every time the real issue.

#4 is to confirm your spouse; look her in the eyes and say you love her.

#5 is to be yourself from the beginning, show your genuine self.

Sometimes though and for different reasons things are going completely out of control and a solution seems out of reach. My experience is that it´s almost impossible to get through to each other when carry hurt feelings. It just has to lay low for a time until the smoke has cleared the air after the "explosion". At that time it is very wise to get some professional help for example therapy about relationship in some form; there´s some good resources both online and "offline" so to say. In closing I would like to say stick to what you have and take your part of the responsibility both for the good and the bad!

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