Suppose you’ve already dealt with a cheating man once and let him back into your life. For a while everything has been going well. He comes home when he’s supposed to and he’s where he’s supposed to be at all times. It seems that he’s done everything possible to make it up to you and you’re starting to slowly trust him again. Suddenly, some little signs start popping up again.
His cell phone rings and he either ignores it if you’re around or he takes the call in another room. He starts setting his phone to silent when he’s home and doesn’t check calls, voice mail, or texts messages in your presence. It makes you feel that he’s hiding something from you.
Then, there’s that first night he calls and tells you he must work late. Now, he could very well be working late, but when you call him later on his work phone, he doesn’t answer even though his phone has caller ID and he can clearly see it’s you calling. Next, you try his cell phone and he doesn’t answer that, either. It’s not looking promising.
When you question him about his actions, he’s quick to assure you that you have nothing to worry about. His behavior returns to normal and you start to calm down some. You also begin to watch him less. However, he’s begun spending a lot of time on his laptop. In fact, he seems to stay on it some nights well into the wee hours. He tells you that he’s brought work home with him and that’s what he’s doing.
One day, you decide to check out his laptop while he’s in the shower. You find that he’s changed all of his passwords as well as erased any browser history. That’s kind of a red flag for a man that’s been caught cheating before. He may not be using his cell phone to communicate with other women because he can chat with them online while you’re sleeping.
It’s hard to know when signs are actually signs or if they’re really what your man is telling you they are. Broken trust has to be repaired if the relationship is going to work. So if he’s repeating past actions that make him look suspicious, it’s time to address them.
If he’s serious about rebuilding the relationship, he needs to give you all of his passwords to things, and stop hiding his calls and texts from you. By doing this, he’s showing you that he doesn’t have anything to hide and that he really wants to be back with you. On the other hand, if he wants to fight you on this, chances are that he’s back up to his old tricks and you need to make some hard decisions.